The Joy of Following Your Own Rules

There is significant pressure in the world for us all to be perfect. The perfect employee, parent, student, child, and so on. There is a seemingly endless supply of information available claiming that it can help us get closer to that goal of perfection.  The pressure of this constant pushing can be hard to handle, and some make different choices (good and bad) than they might without the social pressures.

While it might sound easy, it is actually difficult to let go and ignore the people who should really have no say in our lives. Sometimes we need to put the blinders on and focus on doing the best we can with what we feel is important, rather than doing the best we can to fit the expectations of others. It is a challenge, especially now when new is so immediate and our lives feel so interconnected via social media.

I have found that there is a movement out there to help us all focus on what is truly important (the health and happiness of ourselves and those we love) rather than fitting the labels perfect1or expectations others might want to impose on us. Here are a variety of book that encourage us to let go of those restrictions to take care of ourselves and our loved ones in our own way. Fair warning though, there is some censored profanity in some of the titles, and the tone of the book often matches the title.

Big Girl: How I Gave up Dieting and Got a Life by Kelsey Miller

The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck: How to Stop Spending Time You Don’t Have with People You Don’t Like Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do by Sarah Knight

Instant Mom by Nia Vardalos

Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional by Dale Archer

jacket-aspxF*ck Feelings: One Shrink’s Practical Advice for Managing All Life’s Impossible Problems by Michael I. Bennett, MD, and Sarah Bennet

The Tao of Martha: My Year perfect2of LIVING, or Why I’m Never Getting All That Glitter Off of The Dog by Jen Lancaster

Helping Me Help Myself: One Skeptic, Ten Self-Help Gurus, and a Year on the Brink of the Comfort Zone by Beth Lisick

Fat Girl Walking: Sex, Food, Love, and Being Comfortable in Your Skin– Every Inch of It by Brittany Gibbons

Do you have a favorite read that helps remind you to just be you and ignore the critics of society? Please share it with us in the comments!

Helping Young Children Deal With Grief

griefp1When a family faces grief due to the loss of a pet, home, or family member it is often hard to help our youngest family members deal with the changes. Sometimes we are so busy trying to deal with our own grief and the practical matters that need to be handled that we don’t have the energy and creative thinking necessary to handle the questions children have. Here are a variety of books that might help you and your kids deal with the emotions and changes.

In Our Parenting Section:griefp2
Tear Soup: a Recipe for Healing After Loss by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen; illustrated by Taylor Bills

Lifetimes: a Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingp

griefp3When Dinosaurs Die: a Guide to Understanding Death by Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown

Guiding Your Child Through Grief by Mary Ann Emswiler and James P. Emswiler

When Children Grieve: For Adults to Help Children Deal GRIEF1with Death, Divorce, Pet Loss, Moving, and Other Losses by John W. James and Russell Friedman with Leslie Landon

With Our Picture Books and Children’s Non Fiction:
Always and Forever by Alan Durant; illustrated by Debi Gliori

Badger’s Parting Gifts by Susan Varleygrief8

When Aunt Mattie Got Her Wings by Petra Math

The Fall of Freddie the Leaf: a Story of Life for All Ages by Leo Buscaglia

I’ll Always Love You by Hans Wilhelmgrief5

Boats for Papa by Jessixa Bagley

Harry & Hopper by Margaret Wild

When People Die by Pete Sanders and Steve Myersgrief7

Death by Patricia J. Murphy

When a Pet Dies by Fred Rogers

November is Native American Heritage Month

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What started at the turn of the century as an effort to gain a day of recognition for the significant contributions the first Americans made to the establishment and growth of the United States, resulted in President George Bush approving a joint resolution in 1990 designating the whole month of November as Native American Heritage Month.  These original inhabitants of the United States deserve to be honored for their contributions, achievements, sacrifices, and cultural and historical legacies.

The first evidence showing indigenous people to inhabit North America indicates that they migrated here from Siberia over 11,000 years ago. They prospered until around the 15th century when Europeans first arrived.  History was not kind to the Native Americans from that point on.  Today they account only for 1.4 percent of the population and live on designated Indian reservations that are described as ‘third world country’ conditions.  It wasn’t until The 1924 Citizenship Act, that all Native Americans were finally granted U.S. citizenship.

Some of the contributions from Native Americans include:

  1.  Many states names are of Indian derivation, including Connecticut, which means “river whose water is driven by tides or winds”.
  2. Ecology has always been a way of life for Native Americans.  The word ‘conservation’ does not exist in their language because it is an assumed way of life.
  3. Many of the foods we eat today were first grown by Native Americans – including potatoes, beans, corn, peanuts, pumpkins, tomatoes, squash, peppers, nuts, melons, and sunflower seeds.
  4.   Many of the games we play today came from Native Americans – canoeing, snowshoeing, tobogganing, lacrosse, relay races, tug-of-war, cat’s cradle, and ball games.
  5. Benjamin Franklin borrowed the idea of a federal government, in which certain powers are given to a central government and all other powers are reserved for the states, from the system of government used by the Iroquoian League of Nations.
  6. Native Americans developed and communicated with sign language.

Native Americans have a highly respected value system:

  1.  Respect for Mother Earth (Ecology)
  2. Respect for Fellow Man (No Prejudice)
  3. Respect for the Great Spirit (God)
  4. Generosity, sharing, honest leadership selection, bravery, courage, respect for the aged, family traditions.

The library has a wide variety of materials on Native Americans.  Since the Cheshire  schools study the history of Native Americans, our Children’s Department has an extensive collection of books on the subject for check-out.  The Librarian at the Children’s Desk can direct you in locating these materials.

For the adults, here’s a sample of some of the titles you can find at the library.

Tragic Encounters: the people’s history of Native Americans tragic-encountersA United States historian, author, professor and community activist, presents a meticulously researched history of Native Americans after the first European contact, exploring these peoples from coast to coast and giving them a chance to tell their own broad story.

tribeTribe, Race, History: Native Americans in southern New England – Tribe, Race, History examines American Indian communities in southern New England between the Revolution and Reconstruction, when Indians lived in the region’s socioeconomic margins, moved between semi-autonomous communities and towns, and intermarried extensively with blacks and whites.

connecticuts-indigenousConnecticut’s Indigenous People: what archaeology, history, and oral traditions teach us about their communities and cultures – A groundbreaking volume on the rich 13,000-plus-year history and culture of Connecticut’s indigenous peoples.

 

custers-trialsCuster’s Trials: a life on the frontier of a new America – A biography of the iconic Civil War commander examines his contributions to politics and the Industrial Revolution, sharing insights into his turbulent relationships, perspectives on Native Americans, and conflicts with the military.

jacksonlandJacksonland: President Andrew Jackson, Cherokee Chief John Ross, and a great American land grab – Presents a narrative history of President Andrew Jackson and Cherokee Chief John Ross–two heroic yet tragically opposed men whose actions decided the fate of states and Indian nations in America at a moment of transition.

A History of the Indians of the United States- a-history-of-the-indians-of-the-united-statesTraces the history of the American Indians as a distinct social and cultural group in the United States, providing the basis for a critical reappraisal of government Indian policy.

 

windsWinds of Freedom: the story of the Navajo Code Talkers of World War II – Margaret Bixler

 

 

codeWarriors: Navajo Code Talkers Black-and-white photographic portraits of 75 survivors from the Navajo radio operators whose native tongue proved an unbreakable code to the Japanese during World War II.

 

towardToward the Setting Sun: John Ross, the Cherokees, and the trail of tears – Brian Hicks – Documents the story of a first white man to champion the Native American cause, describing his four-decade chieftainship throughout a turbulent period of racism, western expansion and broken treaties.

The Dying Grass: a novel of the Nez Pierce wardying-grass (Fiction) – William T. Vollman – Describes the 1877 war that pitted the legendary Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce against Civil War Veteran General Oliver Otis Howard. By the author of Europe Central.

 

Pushing the Bearpushing (Fiction) – Diane Glancy – Chronicled through the diverse voices of the Cherokee, white soldiers, evangelists, leaders, and others, a historical novel captures the devastating uprooting of the Cherokee from their lands in 1838 and their forced march westward.

 

calebCaleb’s Crossing (Fiction) – Geraldine Brooks – Forging a deep friendship with a Wampanoag chieftain’s son on the Great Harbor settlement where her minister father is working to convert the tribe, Bethia follows his subsequent ivy league education and efforts to bridge cultures among the colonial elite.

 

runnerRunner (Fiction) – Thomas Perry – Native American guide Jane Whitefield returns from retirement to the world of the runner determined to hide a young pregnant girl who has been tracked across the country by a team of hired hunters.

 

Bury My Heart at Wounded Kneebury-my-heart (DVD) – Fictionalized account of the forced annexation and assimilation of Native Americans in the nineteenth century West.

 

For more fiction books with Native American theme, click here.

For Romance readers, two authors have concentrated their writings on the American West – Cassie Edwards and Leigh Greenwood.  Click on their name for a list of titles.

For those who like to read Western Fiction, we have a great assortment from these three authors – William Johnstone, Elmer Kelton, and Zane Grey.  Click on their names for a list of titles.

In 2015, President Obama wrote a moving proclamation that sums up the ideals behind National Native American Heritage month.  You can read President Obama’s Presidential Proclamation for National Native American Heritage Month here.

On a personal note, it’s rare to find a New Englander who doesn’t embrace Colonial decor, but I don’t.  I think in a past life, I must have resided in the old American West!   I love contemporary decor with Southwest touches.  I was fortunate enough to visit the Southwest and bought home a few souvenirs.  (Can you spot the four snowmen I forgot to remove from the display?)

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Sources:  Bureau of Indian Affairs, U.S. Department of the Interior, The White House, USDA: Natural Resources Conservation Service, Indians.org

A New Batch Of Cozy Mysteries

autumn reading

Finally!  The cool weather is here!  If you like it hot and humid, this was the perfect summer for you.  Hope you were able to enjoy some cozy mysteries by the beach, pool, or in some air conditioning!  Now Fall is here and we have a bunch of new titles for you to snuggle up with.  Enjoy!

digging up the dirtDigging Up The Dirt (A Southern Ladies Mystery) – Miranda James – When eligible bachelor Hadley Partridge returns to Athena to restore his family mansion, he finds a dead body and he must weed through the clues to discover the killer.

 

cancelledCancelled by Murder (A Postmistress Mystery) – Jean Flowers – When the dead body of fabric-shop owner Daisy Harmon is found after a massive storm, postmistress Cassie Miller is asked by Daisy’s widowed husband to find the truth before someone else is swept away by a killer.

murder of a crankyMurder of a Cranky Catnapper (A Scumble River Mystery) – Denise Swanson – When her pet-therapy project ends in murder, Scumble River School psychologist Skye Denison Boyd must find out who killed a curmudgeonly school board member before she meets the same fate.

no farmNo Farm, No Foul (A Farmer’s Daughter Mystery) – Peg Cochran – When the minister’s wife is murdered on her property during a fundraiser for a local church, Shelby McDonald, the owner of the Love Blossom Farm in the small Western Michigan town of Lovett, must dig in her heels and find the killer herself.

behind-chocolateBehind Chocolate Bars (A Chocolate Covered Mystery) – Kathy Aarons – While preparing for the annual West Riverdale Halloween Fair, business partners Michelle and Erica find themselves trick-or-treating for the truth as they try to prove the innocence of one of Erica’s comic-book club members when he is accused of murder. Includes chocolate-making recipes.

hammettThe Hammett Hex (A Book Collector Mystery)  – Victoria Abbott – While on a romantic trip to San Francisco with Officer Tyler Smiley Dekker, Jordan Bingham, in the process of returning a rare copy of Dashiell Hammett’s Red Harvest for her employer, discovers that someone is trying to kill them.

high-kicksHigh Kicks, Hot Chocolate, and Homicides (A Happy Hoofers Mystery) – Mary McHugh – When the Happy Hoofers score a gig at New York City’s Radio City Music Hall with the legendary Rockettes during the Christmas Spectacular, the toe-tapping troupe must solve a murder in between rehearsals and sightseeing before someone else dances to their death.

its-your-partyIt’s Your Party, Die If You Want To (A Liv and Di In Dixie Mystery) – Vickie Fee – While planning a riverboat gambler-themed engagement party, a murder mystery dinner for charity, and a businesswoman’s’ retreat, party planner Liv McKay must solve the murder of a party girl with a penchant for married men, but her efforts are thwarted by a killer with one seriously haunting vendetta.

killing-thymeKilling Thyme (A Spice Shop Mystery) – Leslie Budewitz – When she encounters an old friend who disappeared years ago, and who then is murdered only days later, spice shop owner Pepper Reece digs up the dirt on Seattle’s Pike Place Market to catch a killer only to place her own life in danger.

masking-for-troubleMasking for Trouble (A Costume Shop Mystery) – Diane Vallere – When the venture capitalist who was trying to push out local businesses, including hers, is found dead during a Halloween party, costume-shop owner Margo Tamblyn is the top suspect and must unmask the real killer before she is forced to wear prison stripes.

semi-sweetThe Semi-sweet Hereafter (A Chocolate Whisperer Mystery) Colette London – While in London to lend her expertise on all things chocolate to a posh chocolaterie-patisserie, detective constable Hayden Mundy Moore stumbles upon the dead body of a sexy celebrity chef who just happens to be the ex-husband of Hayden’s client and must unwrap the clues to catch a killer with a sweet tooth.

witchThe Witch and the Dead (A Wishcraft Mystery) – Heather Blake – When she discovers a pile of old bones in her Aunt Ve’s garage under a mess of memories and forgotten possessions, wish-granting witch Darcy Merriweather must solve a cold case to keep her aunt from doing a spell in prison

by-familiarBy Familiar Means (A Witch’s Cat Mystery) – Delia James -While painting murals in a new coffee house, witch and artist Annabelle Britton is asked by the owners to evict a restless spirit before the grand opening, which leads to the discovery of hidden smugglers tunnels beneath the shop, a dead body and a killer with a score to settle.

paws-andPaws and Effect (A Magical Cats Mystery) – Sofie Kelly – When her old beau, Detective Marcus Gordon, is accused of murder, resourceful librarian Kathleen and her magical felines must paw through the clues to discover who is trying to frame him for murder.

 

seeds-ofSeeds of Deception (An Orchard Mystery) – Sheila Connolly – While honeymooning at Monticello and enjoying Thomas Jefferson’s orchards, newlyweds Meg and Seth discover that something rotten is going on at home and must cut their vacation short when the police pick Meg’s father as the killer of a handyman.

The Cover Was Blue.

How many times has someone recommend a book, or you saw a book on the shelf and did not have time to read it, and you thought you would remember the author or title when it came time to find it and read it yourself? It happens to us too. We know exactly who wrote that book or series, at least until someone asks us. When that happens, we use our skills and look it up, even though we feel like we should already know the answer.

bluebooksSometimes no one can remember enough of the author or title to do the necessary searching to figure out the answer. Often times at this point all any of us can remember is the color or image on the cover. For some reason, the cover in these cases is almost always blue. So, here are some of the most popular books that might fit the bill if you are looking for a popular read and all you can remember is that the cover was blue. I have noted any books shelves in or children’s room with a J, and any books shelved in our young adult or teen area with a YA.

The Fault in Our Stars by John Green (YA)
The Boy in the Striped Pajamas by John Boyne
Lone Wolf by Jodi Picoult
The Selection by Kiera Cass (YA)
All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr
The Coldest Girl in Coldtown by Holly Black (YA)
The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein
Dairy Queen by Catherine Gilbert Murdock (YA)
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman (J)
Wonder by R.J. Palacio (J)

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The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Eragon by Christopher Paolini (YA)
Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins (YA)
The Wind is Not a River by Brian Payton
The Whole Enchilada by Diane Mott Davidson
Firefly Lane by Kristin Hannah
The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

This is only a small portion of possibilities, as blue seems to be a very popular color for book covers. Are you still searching or need a different cover color? Comment with the information you do have and I will do my best to find the book for which you are searching!